Friday, April 27, 2012


This is how it is most days......

Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, And Nobody

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.
There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.
Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.
Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job.
Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.
It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

Wednesday, April 25, 2012


Can you believe I already developed a love hate relationship with blogging.
Last time it was a year or so before I became uninterested in blogging.
This time, I think I was supposed to (by my own standards) keep up with all this infertility stuff in a timely manner, so that I can help "someone" out there in the bloggy world....that the schedule bomb-barded my mind so much it became overwhelming when I was behind the schedule....and it is kind of like, outta site outta mind.....and when it came to mind, I would sit here infront of a blank blogpost, and wonder where I should begin....
And here I am.
There are actually words on this blogpost.
Not any that update you on my infertilty, but more or less update you on my anxiety on being behind, ha.
After I hit "publish" on this post, I will then proceed to do a few more posts to update you on a few going ons......just to keep the idea of this blog going!

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Random busy and chatty.....aka brain dump.

This post is full of me chatting about how busy I am, and then I go into the randomness of life....hang in there, not sure I ever make sense, but it does make for some good "kill the time" reading (Brandon knows what I mean! ha!)

So tomorrow (or later today, seeing as it is 12:33am).... I am hosting a Jordans Essential Party. My friend from Elementary school is selling it and I volunteered to host a party. yay for having friends over! It has been a year since I hosted a "party" for someone who has started selling stuff....there should be a small gathering of people, I am excited. I like the set up, decorating, and food prep for menu includes the following:

Crescent Jalapeno bites - pinterest idea
Roasted sweet peppers stuffed with muenster cheese and sausage - accidental invention that my husband loves!
Ham and Swiss sliders on sweet Hawaiian bread - always a hit
Veggies with Ranch - in individual cups, again pinterest.

I have a friend coming over early tomorrow afternoon to help set up, and clean's always funner to do this when you have a friend to shoot the breeze with. Hopefully I will remember to take pictures.

My weekends in April are jammed pack, and even so, the first week of May has something going on too.

Next weekend I have Julie and Emma's babys shower, the weekend after that I have (all in one day) a wedding shower, a local women's conference, and a birthday party for my little niece Calista.

Then the weekend in May I have a baby shower for my cousin's wife, and my grandma is coming to stay for a few days....

Not to mention all my other daily grinds.....babysitting, fertility treatments, church activities, family activities, etc etc etc.


So with all this, I am itching to make my to-do and to-buy lists. baby showers are my favorite to buy all the baby stuff. but who knew some of it was so expensive....poor parents and having do buy diapers, it is almost enough to go to cloth diapers, ha.

And speaking of lists, I am going to be making an official "operation prepare for baby" list that I think I will update like I used to update my 30/30 list. To hold me a little more accountable for getting things done instead of talking about it.

Have I ever mentioned that I love pinterest? I do.
I just spent 2 hours combing it for different ideas on random stuff, from hairstyles to baby shower gift ideas.....
Did you know there was a Mantrist? it is pinterst for husband has browsed it a bit, there were some funny things on there.

So on Easter I broke my phone ....great, yeah I know, not only am I messy but loveable, but we can add clumsy also.....well, we found Aaron's old phone and I have had it switch to my  number until we can get my phone replaced via was quite a peaceful week without all the calls and texts, it makes me miss the old times, you know, when you had to have a phonebook, and memorize numbers and call from a landline, because that or a payphone were your only's crazy how developed things have got.

Baby Emma is doing well! She is now off the cpap machine, and they took her off the billi lights, so all she has left is a feeding tube and an IV.....she is trucking along! yay!
That's all I got for now.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Emma Rae

My little niece Emma Rae Starling was born Thursday April 5th....she was born at 29.5 gestation, and she was 16inch long.
She is itty bitty, and will be in the NICU for a while, but.....we love her, and can't wait to kiss her smoochy cheeks and spoil her rotten like we do to my niece Victoria....

Round 3

So Thursday of last week I started round 3 of my clomid treatments......yay. more sonograms, more medicine, more blood tests....yay.
I am thankful that I have the ability to do all of this.
Reading online, the average of the ladies who did these treatments got preggo at about 4-6 treatments.

Again, just for kicks, if I got pregnant this round, I would be due around or about, January 7,2013.

EEEK. why does 2013 sound soooooooooooooooo far away yet, I know it is next year.
Back to the Future really got to my head about where I thought this world be in the ways of technology, flying skateboards yet.....geez.

Well for the record, 13 is my lucky number!
I turned 13 on Friday the 13th in the year 1993............

So I am feeling good about this, lol...... not to mention, I know the Lord will supply! :-)

No Dice.

Alternate title: Day Late and a Dollar Short.
The alternate title is probably the best description.

According to my phone application "my days"ovulation tracker ... I was suppose to have my AF  yesterday. Which you can only imagine when i went all day without even a single cramp....when i still had my lady parts that were sore....and when i seemed to be overly emotional with a lingering headache ..... I promptly went to the pregnancy test.....and to my line showed. Grrrrr. I sat in the bath - which i only had warm in case i was Preggo.....don't want to cook the little one - for a good hour reading and reading the instructions for the test....making sure i had done it right....maybe it was too early to tell...maybe i didn't do it right....maybe i am one of those like my mom....who could only tell by a blood test....maybe.....
A few hours earlier i was at our churches ladies prayer meeting. It was powerful! there were ladies there battling in the spirit the same things i am....including but not limited to fear and self doubt...we prayed for many requests for our church but when it was time to pray for each other then we had a move of the Spirit like one i have felt only a few times. You could feel fear fleeing....lives changed....hearts mending. It was palatable.
So imagine my surprise laying in the tub looking at the negative test yet still not having AF.
I went to bed at about 2am. 330am i was still fighting sleep. Jason who never sleeps turned to me and senses something wrong immediately started praying for my peace of mind. I have a lot to do...a surprise party to pull off another conference to have to chaperon and Easter to orchestrate not to include our families Easter celebration..... So after listing Jason my stresses with my todo list he makes me get up and do what i do best....make a list.
After i fill a whole sheet of paper with my todos .... I lay down. He prays more i cry a little more...the negative test weighed on my mind a little more than i wanted....then next thing i know its 730am and time for my niece and nephew to come over.
Fast forward through a bad storm .... Through not getting much of my list because of the baffled storm ....and cooking dinner. BAM! cramps! ugh. Hello AF...jerk.

So, long story short, I am not pregnant. Just a day late and a dollar short. literally.

For the record, this post was written on Wednesday April 4th.
I have had a few posts that I started, and will be finishing in order, in detail, and all that jazz....sorry I fell off the bandwagon for a few days, left you hanging, and wondering I am sure.....posts to come....ha. promise.

Monday, April 2, 2012

To Be or Not to Be - That's How I Drive Myself Insane.

At what point do you feel like you are crazy?
"Waiting" to know if this week is AF or a positive pregnancy test....everything.that.happens. I assume is a sign for something.....any cramp or stomach pain, is AF cramps. Any unsettled stomach, or indigestion indicates pregnancy. Any headache backache, or grumpy attitude is AF. Any emotional tear, craving, short temper is pregnancy....wait short temper could be AF, so could the tears and cravings......AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
I am sure having a baby the old fashioned way is soooooooooooo much easier, and a whole lot less analytical. ha.
But it is hard to not jump back and forth. Doing such treatments for infertility, you want to believe that everything will point to that second little pink line on the pregnancy test. But knowing what you know about how your body has been is a little discouraging, and expected just to have another AF this month....
People say that once you stop trying it's when it will happen, and not to take all the little "symptoms" to heart....
"Have fun with the process"

Well, I didn't "try" for two years, and it didn't happen.
Now we are trying.

I am having a good time with MOST of the process.....but this mental countdown on when I should be "starting" vs. taking yet ANOTHER pregnancy test......this is what is the making me insane. ha.
God knows, and HE provides.....but doesn't mean I don't get locked in the looney bin in the process! ha!

Here's praying for a good week......

Okay so onto my "Operation Prepare for Baby"....

Here is this weeks "to do" list.
  • Finish ALL the laundry in the house - About three more loads
  • Start on the laundry in the garage - it's a bunch of random stuff that's been out there since we moved in, it may be "washed" already, but it has been in the garage for so long it smells like a garage.
  • Sort through my room for garage sale purge.
  • Organize all the pants that I am converting into skirts....the office is cluttered with them.
Thats going to be it for this week....I have a busy week as is with some of my church responsibilities. Jason and I are going to a Youth Conference this Thursday Friday and Saturday, I have Easter celebration to finish organizing, as well as buying the supplies for, and then a special event that is coming up....lots of planning....and last minute things....
Now I am going to take a minute, and switch out the laundry, then snuggle with my nephew while he watches Super Why! yay!